Hatred With Benefits

EVA.

It feels like my heart is about to jump out of my chest with how fast it's thumping, like the sound of galloping horses as I watch Emerson between my legs.

I close my parted lips, swallowing down my dry throat before I open my mouth to speak. "What do you mean with those words?"

Emerson drops my legs and moves to his feet before he says, "You heard what I said, Carson."

"I heard words that shouldn't be. "I retort and he takes a step closer. "You heard exactly how I feel. I feel more than just sex with you.

"1

"We already hate each other. "I point out and Emerson shakes his head with a small laugh. "More than that, Carson. I feel more with you. I feel so fucking more that it's starting to annoy me and I just can't keep it to myself." He ends his words with a groan as he drops his hand to my waist.

"What's your definition of more?" I take the chance to ask, and he lifts his other hand to my mouth; parting my lips and slipping a finger inside as he says, "I want you to give me more of you. I want to know you more than this, and I want us to be more, Eva without having to worry about going over the line, or breaking the rules. "His eyes don't leave mine with each word he utters, and they're staring deep into my soul- threatening me to make a move.

"The rules were made so we wouldn't want more than we agreed to in the beginning, Emerson. "I slip my mouth from his finger so I could talk, and Emerson nods. "We made the rules, and we can break them.

"What if more doesn't work?" I lift my brows at him and he presses his hands behind me as he says, "You never know until you try it."

"Emerson, I don't think " I start to say, but he's quick to silence the rest of my words as he opens his mouth. "Give us a month. A month to have more, then you can think of what to do after that." "The semester break is in days. We can't have a month together. " I remind him of the fact that we have to part ways in a few days, and we might not see each other until it's over.

"It lasts for only weeks before we would be back and our houses are beside each other for the break. "Emerson suddenly says and I arch my brows in confusion as I ask, "You're going home?" When Emerson nods, I proceed to say, "Why? I thought you said you hate it there."

"I do, but I can't avoid it either, and I'm not joking about more with you, Eva. I'll take any chances that come my way. "Emerson Ford has never been open about his personal feelings like he's right now, and I'm fucking amazed. He's blunt and something about him being this way pulls at the strings of my heart.

When I don't give a response quick enough, he cups my cheeks in his hands and presses his lips to mine, giving me a taste of him before he pulls back with a tiny smile on his face. "More, Eva. "

"I'll think about it." The words slip through my parted lips, and Emerson stays mute for a beat of a heart before he hums and pulls away.

"What are you doing?" I ask as I watch him move to the other side and grab my panties from the floor. He turns around, and lifts it to his nose- taking a sniff before he hurls it inside his pants pockets.

"You can think about it." It's the only response he gives before he walks out of the room, and leaves me standing with my mouth opened.

I twist my body to the other direction when he's out of the room, and drop my hands on the counter, lowering my head as Emerson's words ring in my ears.

More with Emerson Ford. How far does that more go? More than relishing in each other's comfort? More than having two of the forms of intimacy? And how willing am I to push into that more with him? Along with all its consequences?

I shake my head and extend my hand to grab the glass of water I left previously, downing the entire content before I drop the glass.

I want you to give me more of you, Eva. Why did he have to make it sound like that? Enough to have me questioning my decisions and what would be at stake.

I heave a sigh before I follow in the path Emerson took, grabbing my bag from the couch as I stride in the direction of my room. I stop at the sight of Emerson's room beside mine, and seconds pass before I gnaw at my lips and proceed to move inside my room, shutting the door behind me with my racing heart never calming.

I throw my bag to the bed, and strip out of my clothes as I stride inside the bathroom, careful with the close of the door behind me before I walk into the shower with the new layer of Emerson Ford never leaving my mind.

I shut my laptop and move it back to its spot by the bedside before I slide under the duvet. A frown makes its way to my face as I glide my hand across the space beside me with its occupant out of sight.

I turn to lay my back against the mattress as I stare at the door for some seconds before I drop back to my side and force my eyes closed.

After trying and failing to snatch my sleep without Emerson Ford beside me, I let out a groan of annoyance and sit up on my bed, yanking the duvet from my body.

Without giving it another thought, I'm out of my bed, out of my room and strolling in the direction of the room next to mine.

I lift my hand to the frame to make contact of my knuckles with it, but I drop it to grab the knob instead. When I turn the knob, and push the door- it welcomes me and I walk through it, flinching a bit at the sight of Emerson on his bed in only his boxers and his hands behind his head; the view making it seem like he knew I was coming.

"Hey," he says as I close his door. "Can't sleep?"

I hum and Emerson moves one hand from behind to make a gesture with his finger as he says, "Come here."

I follow through with the command and stride toward him. When I'm within arm's length, he lifts his body slightly from the bed to wrap his arms around my middle before falling back on the mattress with me on top of him.

"I couldn't sleep either. " He confesses and my lips curve into a smile at his words before I adjust my head on his chest, trying to find that place that's become a favourite spot of mine, one where the echoes of his heartbeats become music to my ears. When I do, I drop my hands on his shoulder and shut my eyes, letting the peaceful silence take over.

Emerson shifts underneath me, slipping his right leg between my thighs and the scrape of his boxers against the skin brings me back to our earlier conservation, and my eyelids flutter as I lift my head to stare at Emerson.

"What made you feel that way?" My voice echoes across the room, breaking the silence between us and Emerson drops his gaze to me with his chin pressing into his collar.

"What made me feel what way?" He repeats my words and I say, "What you said in the kitchen earlier. Why do you feel that way?"

"Do I have to have a reason to feel for you?" He throws back, and my heart jumps at his words; the ringing loud in my ears.

"You do. You might be too obsessed with having sex with me and think of it as something else, Emerson. Maybe you don't want more with—"

Emerson doesn't allow me to finish my words before he cut me off with a rough voice. "You think I wouldn't know the difference between wanting to fuck you more and wanting more of you? If I wanted more fuck, I wouldn't need to ask, Eva, because our whole agreement was based on that."

"Was?" I note his use of the past tense, as if that agreement no longer exists between us and Emerson's smile appears as he tightens his hold around my body, and says, "You said you would think about it. " "But that doesn't mean yes, Ford. "I tell him and his smile turns into a smirk, "Yes, it does. "

"You should never be too confident with me, Emerson. "

"I am." He chuckles before turning around and bringing me with him, so we're laying on our sides with our chests pressed to each other. "I'm the most confident when it comes to you, because I know your body, and I know the way it reacts to me."

"You feel with your heart, not your body. You should do your research properly, Ford. "I taunt him and he lets out a chuckle before he says, "You feel with your body before you feel with your heart. The two correlate with each other, and I know the way your body feels."

"How?" I take the risk to ask him in the silence of the night and Emerson's hand lifts from my waist to my arm, giving slow strokes that I feel through the thin material I have on.

"Responsive," he says as he moves his hand higher. "Highly responsive. " He adds as he drops it to my shoulder. "A desire for more." He slides his hand past my shoulder to the side of my neck and I close my eyes briefly to the warmth of his touch, before I open them to clash against his brown orbs, and they pull me in. "And extremely needy." He stops at my face and taps my cheek.

I clear my throat, cutting through the tension that's grown between us and hoping he doesn't notice the way my heart is racing wildly against his chest-triggered by his words, and his gaze. "You never know, Ford. "

Emerson snickers before he drops one hand to the small of my back, and pulls my face to his chest while the free hand brushes my hair.

"I know you want the same as I do, Carson. I'm just waiting for you to realize it." He whispers, and when I attempt to lift my head from his chest; he presses harder and says, "Close your eyes, Eva. Before I snatch what you need from you."

Knowing the hidden meaning behind those words, my core throbs in response to them and feeling the need to defy Emerson; I don't close my eyes. Instead, I sneak my hands down the space between our lower bodies, and grip him through the front of his boxers.

"Carson-" he groans when he feels the touch, his grip loosening on me and I raise my head to the side of his face, whispering to his ear. "Shush. Keep your eyes closed, Ford. "

I trace the outline of his cock with my finger before squeezing through his boxers and Emerson breathes down my neck as he lets out a grunt. "You're starting something you won't finish, Carson. "

"I'm not starting anything, you horny asshole. I'm trying to find a better sleeping position. "I tell him and Emerson's amused voice echoes in my ears as he asks, "With my cock?"

"Yeah, "I respond and slip my hand past the waistband of his boxers to hold his bare cock in my hand. He's so fucking hard, and I take a second to tease him by pressing the tip of my finger into the crown of his cock.

"Eva" Emerson drawls this time, and a smirk climbs on my face at the sound that comes from his- deprived. So fucking deprived. I repeat the action to hear the sound again, but Emerson yanks me back instead; his heated gaze resting on mine.

"Stop." He repeats the words that he's been saying, in a warning tone and I push my face forward. "Why? Does it make you want more?"

Emerson cackles and slides a hand to the back of my head, using it as an aim to guide my mouth into his. His lips are wet and soft against mine, and I whimper against his mouth when he sinks his teeth into my lips- harsh enough to almost draw blood.

"Fuck you." I seethe when I pull back, bringing my hand to my lips to soothe the ache. Emerson chortles before he says, "Don't tease me if you don't want me to give you more than just bruised lips. "Just like that." He hums as he brings me back to his chest and I drop my leg over his, leaving them tangled in a mess with my arms wrapped around him.

"

"You honestly can't blame me for wanting more when we're like this. " He mumbles into the air, and I pretend I didn't catch onto his words as I close my eyes and give in to the somnolence in his safe embrace.