Knowing Jude

The next day, on Thursday, that's when I started falling into the trap Jude had set-intentionally or unintentionally-for me. Which is why right now I think I might be developing feelings for him. 'Think' being the operative word.

He came rapping on my window yet again, the time being similar to the night before, and I let him in through my window. His appearance surprised me because I had thought Wednesday night's visit would be a one-time occurrence. Later on, I sat against my headboard and regarded him through half-open eyes.

"You look fine today. Why are you here?"

He had left early that morning, while I'd still been fast asleep. As so was everyone else in the house, thankfully. I could only imagine the storm my parents would kick up if our little arrangement came to light. Little did I know there was another sort of trouble lying in wait.

He shuffled over to my bed, taking off his boots. "I was bored."

I gave him a bewildered look. Bored? It was almost midnight, for heaven's sake.

"You're supposed to be asleep, you know? Like other normal people. That way, you wouldn't get bored."

He shrugged and fell onto my bed, face first. "I couldn't sleep."

"So? You decided it was unfair some of us were perfectly asleep and took it upon yourself to disturb us?"

He turned his face so that he was looking at me. "I doubt you were 'perfectly' asleep, Jo. Last night you wouldn't stop turning. And muttering stuff. You talk in your sleep."

"I don't!" I denied. If I did, Lilian would have laughed at me, and Maria would have been snickering about it all along. About the turning, though... Maybe. I have nightmares occasionally.

"Why would I make it up? It was all nonsense; however, I couldn't make out what you were saying."

I sighed in exasperation. "Whatever, Jude. I want to go to sleep, so leave."

"It's the break, Jo. Why do you even go to sleep so early? How early do you sleep on school days? Eight o'clock?"

I ignored his string of questions. "What are you doing here?"

He disregarded my question. "If you had more friends, you wouldn't be sleeping at a time like this."

I crossed my arms over my chest. "Oh, and lemme guess, you have loads of them?"

"I don't need friends to keep me busy."

"Right, I forgot. You have older women to keep you busy."

He glared. "I thought we "

"Sorry I said that," I apologised. Honestly though, his little confession the previous night had set off a barrage of thoughts in my mind. But I had promised not to judge, so I let it go. "Seriously though, you can't just decide to ambush me in the middle of the night."

"You chose to open the window for me, remember?"

"Wouldn't have if I knew you were okay."

"So you care about my well-being."

"That's what humans do for their friends."

He was silent for a while, tracing patterns on my quilt. "I just wanted to be somewhere... Peaceful."

I arched an eyebrow, wondering what he meant.

"And I wanted to clear things up. Last night was a mistake. I'm not like that. The... About where I told you I was from. I used to do that, but I stopped and last night I... I don't know, it was a bad night." He paused. "I was so ashamed." That was one of the times I do a double-take and confirm that yes, this is Jude talking. I didn't think Jude cared to 'clear up' anything with anyone. It wasn't any of my business, but here he was, going out of his way-and comfort zone-to explain to me.

"Okay," I muttered.

His eyes rose to me. "You're not going to ask about it?"

I shrugged. "You won't answer, so why bother."

"Wise girl."

"Where are you from tonight?"

"Working."

I lifted an eyebrow. "What sort of work?"

"The sort that earns you money."

I gave him a dry stare. "Yeah, I've heard of that once or twice, I think." Then I grabbed a pillow and threw it at his face.

He laughed. "I do all sorts of jobs, okay?"

I rolled my eyes. "So what was your plan, coming here?"

"To just pass time," he replied.

"In the middle of the night."

"Yes, because only lonely people go to sleep early."

I was about to deny that but stopped short. Some part of me knew he was right. If not entirely, partially. Most kids were busy practising unhealthy sleeping patterns at that moment because they were either: chatting up their friends, having fun. in the middle of sleepovers, attending illegal parties, having movie nights with a bunch of friends. Lonely ones were either hogging up movies and series, books, or asleep. For some of them being alone didn't mean they were lonely, for some, it was a choice, then there was the rest who wished they had something better to do. With other people.

When Angie was around, I wasn't alone a lot. And when Jen and I still talked. I might not have hung out with Jen after school as much as we did when Angie was around, but at least then, I had someone to text. Now, after spending the day doing chores around the house and watching, I had little to do during the nights. When I wasn't reading, I ended up in bed early.

I would not say it to Jude, but I was minding his uninvited presence less and less.

As you reach the final pages, remember that 000005s.com is your destination for the complete story. Share the joy of reading with others and spread the word. The next chapter is just a visit away! "I guess," I muttered.

"Want to go somewhere?" he asked.

I gave him a disbelieving look. "You're insane. For suggesting that, and for thinking I could actually agree to something like that."

"Come on, Jo. Live a little."

I sighed and rubbed my feet together. I reached for my covers and pulled them to my waist. A yawn I couldn't prevent let free. "It's cold and I'm losing important sleep time," I complained. "Jo-"

"Can I ask you a question?" I cut him off, suddenly remembering something that had played around my head all day.

He wiggled his brow. "Like yesterday?"

"No, because you won't be staying here tonight."

"Debatable."

"I can assure you it's not."

"We'll see."

"It's about Cole."

He stalled then, a slight frown marring his smooth brow. "What about him?"

His tone alone was enough to discourage me from going any further. I ignored it and went ahead. "He seems fine to me. What did you mean when you said he's damaged? It doesn't make sense."

The main reason I put that question forward was because of Nicki. If she was going to fall for someone, I wanted to look out for her. I knew I couldn't stop her, per se, but as a friend, I felt the need to watch out for her.

I already knew Cole was the classic bad boy. Worse, even, because he was sweet. That's like a wolf in sheep's clothing. You wouldn't know what hit you when you finally got bitten.

Even though Nicki hadn't yet come around to opening up completely about it, I knew it was him, and his personality terrified her. Bad boys hurt people; they don't commit. They break hearts. And knowing how erratic Nicki's emotions were, getting in a relationship with someone who could break her heart at any moment would be a disaster.

"Cole is a good guy," Jude replied then. "Don't get me wrong, he can be a good person. But take my word for it when I say you have no idea how reckless he is. Sometimes he throws caution to the wind and does whatever he wants. That's what I love most about him."

"Of course," I replied to his last comment drily. In my mind, I mulled over his words. And decided that the bottom line was: Cole is trouble.

It's unfair how much of a sweetheart he is.

Jude was a little better. He didn't go smiling at people and drawing them in. No good girl would take a step towards him willingly, because everyone knew exactly how he was. But Cole? He looked and acted like the prince in every little girl's dream. Maybe he enjoyed setting the traps. Then when some delicate heart fell into it, break it and leave without a backward glance.

After a detailed judgement and detailing of Cole's personality in my mind and Jude's merciless teasing about my posters, again we fell asleep.

We.

As you reach the final pages, remember that 000005s.com is your destination for the complete story. Share the joy of reading with others and spread the word. The next chapter is just a visit away!

By the end of all our banter, my eyes were too heavy, and I didn't have enough energy in me to show him out. Besides, by then it was way past midnight and he mentioned he didn't come in his car, so I didn't feel like I could turn him out at that hour. The lucky bastard had it all figured out beforehand, no doubt.

That night didn't end like the other, however, because I woke up in the middle of the night to the sound of Jude calling my name. He was trying to keep his voice low, but loud enough so I could hear him. I woke up gasping, and tears immediately made their way down my face as the nightmare I had reinserted itself in my head. It was horrible, and the sort that made me afraid of falling asleep.

If you dreamt of your dead best friend trying to hurt you, sleep wouldn't be an escape or a luxury anymore.

"The lights," I Mumbled through the sobs that broke through my lips. The room was dark because I usually had a little courage if there was someone else in the room. Alone, I slept with the lights on. There was movement on the bed as Jude left my side. Seconds later, the room was bathed in light. My entire body was shaking with sobs.

Just a dream, just a dream. I said that over and over in my mind as I tried to calm down.

But it was so real.

My bed dipped, then Jude touched my shoulder.

"It's just a dream," he whispered.

I nodded, hiccupping at the same time. I wasn't even ashamed of crying in front of him. I was too afraid to care. I sat there for the longest time, drying tears that kept flowing and shaking from the force of suppressed sobs. Sometime later, Jude wrapped an arm around my shoulders and pulled me to his side.

The gesture set off another flood of tears. I clung to him like a lost child and cried because the loneliness, fear, and despair I was feeling were too much.

Having someone to hold on to somehow made me feel as if I could let it all out.

Later on, I calmed down and pulled away from him. I disappeared into the bathroom to wash my face because it felt so uncomfortable with all the dried tears. When I got back, I settled on my side of the bed, near the very edge. A little embarrassment was finally making its way to the surface. Not for crying, but for clinging to him like that.

The room was silent for a considerable while. I was holding my breath, afraid he would ask questions. I didn't think I had it in me to explain the nightmare yet. Or ever.

I lay there, breathing shallowly, eyes wide open because I didn't want to fall asleep again. Jude tugged the covers slightly, pulling them to himself and slightly uncovering me.

"Stop stealing the blankets," I muttered, trying to pull them back. My voice was hoarse, it being my first attempt at speaking after crying.

"I'm not," he denied, only for him to pull them away again.

"You are."

"If you moved closer you wouldn't be complaining," he said.

My eyes narrowed at the far wall. Once Jude, always Jude. The cunning little-

There was movement behind me. Then Jude's hand hooked around my waist and pulled me into the middle of the bed, my back against him.

"There, sleep now," he whispered, so softly I didn't recognise his voice. His chin rested on top of my hair.

I was prepared to fight, but I was also feeling exhausted, plus it felt so good to be held like that.

So good.

So I stayed.