Sex in C Major

"But-"

"Stef!"

The name so close, so familiar, so alien at the same time, so reminiscent of another time, a worse time, a time as a liar and a con-made Stefan flinch.

"Don't call me that."

It burst out before he could stop it. He winced, and cringed back, expecting questions. Expecting an explanation to be demanded.

Instead, to his surprise, Daz simply said, "Sorry."

Stefan bit his lip, and nodded.

"Stop overthinking," Daz insisted quietly. "Stop asking whether this is normal, or whether other people would get it. You're not a freak for liking sex the way you do. I'm not a cheat for sleeping with other people. Look, I get the idea your life is a bit of a car crash right now, but being kinky doesn't have to be anything to do with that."

"What do you want with me?" Stefan whispered.

"The same as I wanted from the start."

"You told Yannis all about me. Were you...were you priming me for-"

Yannis snorted. "God, no."

"Yeah, no," Daz agreed, with an amused glance at Yannis. "Yan's not into the same sort of stuff. If he ever joins us, it'll be because you or I put in a really, really good plea. Like I said, he's more interested in maths than men."

Stefan huddled a little deeper into his robe. Yannis must be able to tell, right? That Stefan wasn't...

"It'll be just you and me unless you want to widen it," Daz said simply. "And we have some boundaries to establish if you want to keep doing this."

"Like what?"

"What do you want?"

"What?"

"At first, I thought a couple of kinky games and then we'd go our separate ways. Only you kept calling. You kept pushing. You kept wanting to come here. So what do you want? Do you want a bit of fun now and then, or do you want an owner?"

The word tingled against Stefan's skin.

"Yes."

"What?"

"I-I want an owner."

"Tell me what you want."

Daz's voice was very soft. Stefan became distantly aware that Yannis was watching him, but all Stefan could focus on was Daz's bright blue eyes.

So he whispered, "I want an owner. I want to belong to somebody. My-my fantasies always fit into that idea. So if I fantasise about being kidnapped and raped, then my kidnapper would keep me and train me to be his sex slave. Or if I fantasise that I'm being used by a group of guys, it's because my owner has rented me out, or invited his friends to use me like I'm just a piece of entertainment, like a new TV or a games console."

"You want to be a toy."

"Yes."

"A piece of equipment for use."

"Yes."

"Just my use."

Stefan flicked a glance towards Yannis. "Yes," he breathed.

"Fine by me," Yannis said dryly.

Daz laughed.

"Like I said, Stefan, it's more likely you'd get to play with strangers than Yannis."

"I-I want you to keep me," Stefan confessed, twisting his hands around each other in his lap. "I don't want you to love me," he added hastily, glancing again to Yannis. "Just-just keep me and use me. Like a—”

"Sex doll."

The words sent a sharp spike of desire to Stefan's dick.

"Yes."

"We need to work out how," Daz replied evenly. "I have rules. So should you. And taking too much too fast always ends up in disaster, so we need to build up some foundations. But...this is your choice. We build those foundations, and you belong to me...or you walk out the door, no hard feelings, no attempt to stop you."

Stefan glanced towards the living room door.

Get out. No fear of what Daz had in mind. No fear of what Yannis might do, further along the line. No danger of waking up in chains one morning and realising he wasn't playing a game anymore. No risk of his hormones being denied, or his binders destroyed.

And back to online dating sites and seedy bars. Back to 'I don't fuck mental subs.' Back to itching out of his skin, of jerking it until it hurt and it not being enough. Back to being out of control, to watching his life spinning into danger and disaster and having no way of stopping it without going mad.

Daz could stop it.

Daz would stop it.

"I don't want to leave," he whispered. Dragging his gaze up to Daz's, he added, "Sir." 10

Stefan went home after dinner.

Leaving was weird. Yannis had simply ignored him, going back to the piano like he ate with his boyfriend's sex toy every day of the week. Daz, however, had been chatty and almost...affectionate. He'd found some clothes out of Yannis' things and dressed Stefan, then called him eye-catching in blue and kissed him.