The Syndicater: Chapter 5
Something was wrong with her.
Zephyr didn’t think it was just grief anymore. She was sick, sicker than she’d ever been, and somehow, it had gotten worse in the last week. It was times like this that she would have picked up the phone and called her sister. Zenith, level-headed and relaxed as she’d been, would have calmed her down. Zen had always been able to do that.
Zephyr rubbed Bear’s soft fur as the canine lay by her side, his head on her stomach, rumbling like a motor in a way that felt soothing. Ever since the funeral, Bear had almost been inseparable from her. He had always loved her, but her sadness had just made him want to heal her. It wasn’t just him either. The other two dogs had also begun lingering around her, though Baron still didn’t care much for her; at least he sat close to where she was whenever she was in the house. Even the men at AV had somehow taken it upon themselves to help her. She knew of their bullshit excuse of needing paperwork done to get her out and about, and in a way, it was endearing that they cared so much.
The fact was, Zephyr didn’t want to wallow in her grief either. She didn’t want to spend her life being sad, especially when she knew the kind of toll it was taking on her husband and their relationship, too. Alpha, the love of her life, the giant, growly beast of a man, had been nothing but so gentle, so caring with her. It had reminded her of how he’d been a decade ago, with a gentleness inside him he rarely let anyone see. But he’d always had it even without his memories, and one of the biggest proofs of that were the three dogs around her, who had been abandoned, discarded in the trash as puppies, and he’d just picked them up and brought them home and raised them himself.
He was showing her that gentleness now, and she loved him all the more for it, but she knew she needed to snap out of this. Zen would have hated her like this. Her sister would have wanted her to move on with joy and not live in grief. But that was the thing about grief. It wasn’t really in her control. As someone who’d always had a predisposition to depression, she couldn’t decide how to control the grief. Some days, she woke up feeling like it was a better day, that she would be okay, that things were looking up. She would build sandcastles of hope and optimism, and out of nowhere, like an unpredicted wave, the grief would come and crumble it back to nothing but sand, leaving her to rebuild it all over again. Those were the good days. On the bad days, she woke up but wished she didn’t. She loved her life, but she didn’t want to move from the bed.
And that was exactly why, when the men had come up with the idea to get her out, she had let them.
She couldn’t go back to her old life, her old way of being with the way she was anymore. Everything would remind her of things she needed to take some space from to heal. But the AV offices felt like home. There were no bad memories for her there, just a man who had loved her as a girl and loved her again as a woman, and a dysfunctional set of older brothers who had all adopted her into their foray.
Getting ready every day, going to the office to actually do something productive, it helped. And knowing that her help was needed, that added to it. Her husband couldn’t do paperwork and was too mistrustful to ask anyone else to do it after Hector, so it felt completely natural for her to step in and take that part over. No one outside of her knew that he had issues reading, and she would keep it that way as long as he wanted.
Her phone vibrated beside her, and she looked at it to see it was her father.
Zephyr closed her eyes for a second before answering. ‘Papa?’
‘Have you talked to your mother yet?’
Zephyr wished she could say she was surprised at the question, but she wasn’t. She wanted nothing more than to pick up her phone and call her mother, but it was clear why she wouldn’t. Every time she had, her mother had accused Alpha of Zenith’s death, a blame that was never his, but he let her parents blame him because he didn’t want to ruin their memory of who Zenith had actually been. Zephyr had never given thought to her sister’s past before she had come into the family, the issue non-existent for her because, as far as she’d been concerned, she’d gotten a best friend, and that was that. But Zen had never told her, and that hurt Zephyr more than she was willing to admit. Zen had never confided in her about where she had run from, who she had left behind, why she was so passionate about working with survivors. Nothing. A part of her was so pissed at her for not telling. Zephyr would never have judged her. But she also understood why she hadn’t. She’d been trying to forget it.
‘Zephyr?’ her father’s prompt broke through her thoughts.
‘I will when she can accept that my husband is not responsible for what happened,’ Zephyr stated clearly, making her stance clear for the hundredth time. Her father was the only one who called her and talked to her anymore. Since the funeral, her mother had done so a few times, but given up after believing that Zephyr was too blinded or brainwashed by Alpha to see the truth—that he was a monster and he had destroyed their family. A part of Zephyr was itching to tell her the truth, but that would just drag them into this dark world that she herself didn’t understand fully yet. She couldn’t do that to her parents.
Fact was, with or without Alpha, The Syndicate would have caught up to Zenith. They had been searching for her for years. And the outcome would probably have been the same when they found her. Alpha being in their lives had nothing to do with that. In fact, she was alive because of his involvement, because someone called the Shadow Man had known that she was Alpha’s wife and had gotten her to the hospital in time. She didn’t want to think about what could’ve happened if she had been left alone with Zen in the isolated area that night. Hector might have killed her too. She would’ve been nothing but collateral damage. It was a sobering realization.
Her father sighed, the sound weary. ‘You’re our only child left, Zephyr. Your mother might be harsh right now, but she’s grieving. She loves you. You know that.’
Zephyr felt a ball of lump in her throat, one that seemed to be perpetually lodged there these days. ‘So am I, papa. I’m grieving too. Mama needs to let go of her imagined vendetta and accept that whatever happened happened. I was there. She wasn’t.’
‘I know,’ he spoke softly, the pain evident in his voice. ‘Well, I just wanted to check in on you and make sure you were fine.’ She loved her father. He had always been such a gentle, wonderful father to both his daughters, loving them and helping them grow into independent, strong women they had become. She couldn’t remember a time she’d ever questioned his love, and even the fact that he still talked to her every other day while her mother was in a standoff with her spoke volumes. She knew that her mother loved her too, but her way of loving was much different, and sometimes, it hurt her.
‘Are you fine, papa?’ she asked, rubbing Bear’s head as he made a sound at her side.
‘As fine as I can be given things,’ her told her. ‘Just taking it one day at a time.’
That was the way to go forward. One day at a time.
She bid him goodbye and looked out at the lush green view in the setting sun, relaxing into the lounge chair by the pool, the details of that last day playing in her mind as they always did.
In her head, she saw Morana getting shot, a spray of red seeping into her white top as she fell to the ground with a scream, urging her to run and get help. She felt the hands grabbing her and dragging her into a van, seeing her sister there. She saw the chairs, felt the ties binding them, heard the words leave Hector’s lips. She saw her sister struggle, get free, run. And then the gunshot and her life leaving her body.
It was a fuzz after that. She remembered the Shadow Man there, checking Zen’s pulse and saying sorry, picking her up and carrying her to some kind of vehicle. She’d thought she’d blacked out, but as the days went by, memories came in. She hadn’t blacked out, not entirely, but she’d mentally checked out. But she’d been conscious for a bit.
***
The ceiling was moving with lights. No, that couldn’t be.
‘You have to stay awake. You might have a concussion.’
The man driving was telling her, his voice sounding far off, but it couldn’t be. She recognized his voice from before, but she didn’t know him. He was right in front of her. How was he in front? She was lying in the back. That made sense.
Concussion? Why would she have a concussion? Did she?
‘Stay awake.’
But her eyelids were heavy.
‘Tell me about your sister.’
A broken noise filled the car, and she realized it had come from her.
‘Why?’ she sobbed, wanting to understand.
‘So you stay awake.’ His voice was almost clinical in the command. ‘Did she ever tell you about her past?’
‘No. I didn’t… know.’
‘Did she ever mention any friend?’
Zephyr blinked sluggishly, her mind breaking but not processing. ‘No.’
There was silence for a beat. ‘Did she ever mention any man?’
Her head hurt. She raised her hand to touch it, but it was moving too slowly. ‘Stop.’
She heard a breath. ‘Of course. I’m sorry for your loss.’
Tears leaked down the side of her face, and suddenly, she realized she was alone in the backseat. Her heart began to beat frantically. ‘Where is she? Did you just leave her?’
‘No,’ he said. ‘She’s being transferred. You’ll see her soon.’
How? Who was doing it? The questions were making a sharp pain shoot inside her skull. She wanted to close her eyes and sleep.
‘Why me?’ she muttered softly. ‘Why did I… and she didn’t?’
‘She was a part of something much bigger,’ he told her. ‘It caught up to her. You’re powerful now, Mrs. Villanova. If you want to use that power one day, I’ll give you her file.’
She didn’t feel powerful. She felt helpless. ‘How will I find you?’
A beat of silence.’You won’t have to.’
***
And that was all she remembered from that night before she had given in and fallen asleep.
Zephyr knew, thanks to her calls with the girls, everything that had happened in the meantime. It was odd being in the group with them, but Amara, the goddess that she was inside and out, insisted that the only way forward was for them to be together. Zephyr didn’t disagree but her feelings for Morana were complicated, and she knew it was the same for the other woman. The ghost of her sister stood between them, impacting them both in a different way. It might have taken time for them to come to terms with everything, but Amara was hopeful, and her hope was contagious.
Her favorite person through it all, though, outside of her husband, was Dante. If Zephyr hadn’t been in love and happily married, she would have gotten an insane crush on the man just for who he was. Not only had he constantly checked in on her and made sure she was okay, but he had stepped up and helped Alpha restructure and reorganize his empire after the hit of removing Hector and his stooges. Dante had gone as far as to send a bunch of his own trusted men to Los Fortis for a month to help train and hire new recruits, helping sustain the organization without feeling it too much. Zephyr couldn’t imagine how much more stressful everything would have been for Alpha without his brother. And thankfully, that gesture had brought the two men closer. Though her husband still didn’t trust people, especially now, Dante had made it on his list of people to call when needed.
And because of all that, she knew everyone was wary of the Shadow Man. And maybe she was being naive since she hadn’t been a part of their dark world and maybe wasn’t a good judge of character. But the two times she had met him, he had been kind to her, especially that night. That was etched in her memory, and she wanted to one day see him when she was conscious and thank him for saving her, possibly from being murdered that night, and ask why he couldn’t have saved her sister sooner if he’d known so much about it.
‘You have to move on, Zee.’ Zephyr could hear her sister speak as if she was right next to her. ‘This isn’t good for you. You know that.’
‘I know,’ Zephyr said out loud. ‘But it’s rough.’
Zen chuckled in her mind. ‘You like it rough, Zee.’
Zephyr felt a laugh bubble out of her before she blinked, seeing the blood all over her hands in her head, feeling the wet warmth, and knowing it was her sister’s life seeping out; suddenly, she felt sick.
Jumping down from the lounge chair, she rushed to the side of the terrace, dry heaving over the railing, nothing coming out. She could hear the dogs scampering, their nails clicking on the wooden floorboards, barking around her in concern. Her jaw began to tremble, and her arms shook as she gripped the railing and dropped down to the floor. The dogs nudged at her, surrounding her, looking around as if to protect her from whatever had made her scatter.
She breathed deeply, trying to calm her racing heart, tasting the acid in the back of her throat even though nothing had come out. She didn’t understand what was happening to her. It could be her hormones but they’d never made her so sick before. She’d come back from the hospital—she mentally calculated—almost eight weeks ago, and everything had been physically alright with her. She had some medication she had taken for a month, but she’d been off those for a while now. And these bouts of sickness or dizziness came out of nowhere, all of a sudden.
‘Oh my goodness,’ she heard Leah, their housekeeper, exclaim as she came out on the terrace, led by Bandit. Zephyr hadn’t even noticed the dog slipping away to bring help, and she gave him a head rub in thanks for his thoughtfulness, and he returned the gesture by licking her hand with a soft whine.
Leah waded through the canines and helped her stand up. Zephyr held her hand and gripped the railing with the other, waiting for the world to stop spinning.
‘I’m calling Dr. Nei,’ Leah told her, speaking of their on-call medical professional. Yes, Alpha had a doctor on speed dial for his men and the women under his security. Zephyr learned that after she came back home and found that her husband had asked Dr. Nei to check on her every other day, to make sure she was fine. She was physically okay. She always had been. Aside from some superficial injuries and a concussion, they hadn’t had to fix anything at all, not like Morana who had to be admitted into intensive care and had to undergo surgery to come out alive. Out of the three women that day, she was the one who got away scot-free. Maybe that was why she couldn’t shake this sense of guilt that dodged her. She knew logically, it was stupid to think like that. But illogically, a part of her wondered if she wouldn’t feel so guilty if she’d sustained more injuries.
Shit, what was wrong with her? She shouldn’t even be thinking that.
Zephyr let Leah guide her inside the house, straight to the living area with the view, and sank into the couch. The older woman rushed to the kitchen, dialing on her phone and pouring a glass of water, mixing a sachet of electrolytes into them. Zephyr wasn’t dehydrated but she accepted the drink gratefully and took small sips, scared of triggering her gag reflex again.
‘Please come to the house, Dr. Nei.’ She heard Leah talk on the phone. ‘Yes. Okay.’
The older woman turned to her, her face creased with concern. ‘She will be here in ten minutes. I need to inform Alpha.’
Zephyr shook her head. ‘No, he has an important meeting.’ That was all she knew. He was meeting some kind of a source who had some big information about something. ‘Just leave him a text.’
Leah hesitated, but then she nodded, typing on her device. The dogs settled around her once again, this time both Bear and Bandit putting their heads on her stomach and Baron curling up at her feet, and the sight made her lips curl up in a smile, reminding her of this video she’d seen once while scrolling through puppy videos. It had been a video of a woman with a baby and her two dogs sitting next to her, because she had been expecting another.
Zephyr brushed their fur with her fingers when, suddenly, she stilled.
Memories flashed through her mind from a little before the funeral—of Bear, suddenly putting his head on her stomach and sticking to her side, of Bandit, always being two steps behind her, and of Baron, aloof and detached, suddenly being close to her. Zephyr had chalked all their behaviors to them missing her or being close to her during her grief. But what if it wasn’t just that? What if…
She looked down at her stomach in disbelief.
Her curvy, soft stomach with love handles, that had become a bit curvier, and she hadn’t even noticed.
More memories flashed—Alpha pushing her into the bed, his cock deep inside her, coming inside her body. They had never used protection, and she hadn’t wanted to.
But now that the possibility was staring her in the face, she could feel vestiges of panic begin to bloom within her.
Could she be…?
‘Hello, Zephyr,’ Dr. Nei’s voice brought her head up, her mind in a daze, muddled by the fact that she’d been in a hospital and getting checked by doctors, but no one had noticed. Maybe no one had specifically looked for it, given her superficial injuries and her stress and hormonal history.
Dr. Nei, a gorgeous dark-skinned woman in her fifties, came into the living room. She was dressed in a sharp suit and carried a small suitcase Zephyr had never seen her without. She took a seat on the couch adjacent to her. ‘What’s going on?’ she asked.
Zephyr stared at her, processing, wondering how this would change everything, and spoke, hearing the tremor in her voice. ‘I need you to test me.’
‘For what?’ the doctor asked, setting her suitcase to the side.
‘Pregnancy.’